Premarital Counseling - Yes or No

MJ: What are your thoughts on premarital counseling?

Percell: Life does come with a manual; life does come with instructions despite the cliché that it does not. It is astounding that we, as a society, place so much emphasis on school and learning how to work, and so little emphasis on life and learning how to live it. Sadly, we live in a society that would rather seek to redefine marriage than to simply learn to be better suited persons for marriage. The greatest name for this malady does not come from a psychological text, but from a sitcom. It is called “The Fonzie Complex”. Looking in the mirror and seeing only the glamour that you wish to see despite the obviousness to the contrary.

Premarital counseling might be a bit strong. You know that I am extremely spiritual but not religious. Yet, in a past church, the pastor would insist upon premarital coaching. It was making couples aware of the real meanings of emotions, feelings, desires, togetherness, giving, taking, commitment, and more. It was less marital counseling and more of a grow up and be ready for marriage personal counseling for the individuals but done jointly. They were incredible growing sessions.

MJ: I like that line "learn to be better suited persons for marriage." I might have to borrow that quote from you sometime! Of course, premarital counseling puts a lot of pressure on the individual to navigate self - so - pride will definitely need to be overcome to step inside the counselor's office.